How He Loves...

I just finished reading 'The Furious Longing of God' by Brennan Manning and the Lord has used it immensly to restore and renew an understanding in my heart of His deep love for me. 
This is generally something I haven't dwelt on much in the past because it has always been easier for me to explain God's actions and character directly related to his desire to Glorify himself. Claiming the phrase "everything was made to Glorify Christ", which indeed it was. The predicament in my head has been that for quite some time I could pass an understanding of what God was doing and why He was doing it, particularly my life circumstances, with theological explanations, namely, an understanding of what God is rather than who God is, or knowing more about God than truly knowing Him as a friend, and a companion. 

It's been tough to break down walls of guilt in my head that have been built higher and taller through the years. These walls that tell me I am unfit to simply come into the presence of God without first evaluating my spiritual level and consequently having levels of repentance based upon how well I felt that I was doing spiritually. 
Something I've come to understand recently is that my sin is mainly a road block in my mind. 

"It is finished" meant just that. Gods gift of Jesus' sacrifice was not partial or imperfect based upon how many sins I commit and keep track of. God's view of me has never changed, and neither has his love. He saw all I would do while He was on the cross, and still valued me enough to forgive me and wipe the slate clean beforehand. This understanding has left me with a desire to do good because it pleases Him and He loved me first. It is no mistake or coincidence that I'm more satisfied when I do what's right. He designed it this way. He desires for us to do right but his love and acceptance of us had never changed. 
"It is for freedom we've been set free"
, so we can live forgiven and liberated.

This is one of the many reasons why I feel Paul describes the gospel as a mystery. Unconditional love is unconventional, sacrificial, selfless, and many other things that I am not. And the thought of this love pursuing me to the point of complete and final redemption while my actions mock it, is baffling. I'm thankful that His ways are not our ways, He is unconditionally committed to his children. Thank you Father. 

The gospel is everywhere.

I can only imagine what Jesus' silent conversations with His father were like.   As he walked amongst a broken and sick people, he must have silently prayed and pleaded for them.  Before he stepped out on the wavering sea to save his disciples in the midst of the storm, he surely prayed for God to help them believe and see how great He was. 

It must have been more beautiful and pure than any prayer I could imagine but maybe something along the lines of, "I love them Father, use this miracle to open their eyes to see how great I am and one day to see how wonderful you are."  Who knows right? But it is a wonderful thing to think about.

We could argue that Jesus didn't do anything half heartily or halfway. I bet he enjoyed being a carpenter.  

I recently worked with a friend of mine, Brian, to make a coffee table for my house.  I've never been too picky about furniture or style in my home but for reasons that now seem to slip my mind I could not find a single coffee table in Chinandega that I liked. So, ignorantly I said to myself, I'll make one! I can honestly say that if I knew beforehand the work it would take to do this seemingly simple carpentry job, I would have settled for any number of coffee tables I passed up in the local market.  To be honest, I hardly did any of the work because  of my lack of experience.  Sure, I could hold a board here and there or send it through a machine when I was told explicitly clear instructions.  But, I had no clue the hours and dedication it would take to turn dirty damp pine into a clean cut coffee table.   

A month and a half after my visit to the local wood shop, the table sits in my living room with a Metallica picture book and a where's Waldo "Hollywood" edition on it.  You may be reading this and think nothing of that time frame but guys I seriously thought I was going to be carrying a finished table to my house the very same night that I purchased the wood.  

Little did I know there was more than a measuring tape and nails involved.  Turning a "damp" piece of pine into a shaped and measured piece of nail ready wood is quite the process (to say the least).  For the sake of this conversation, I won't get into the intricate details but there are things called plaining, drying, setting, holding, ing, ing, ing, etc...

And it made me think...

I could almost see Jesus taking a bent rough board and working it down piece by piece into a useable plank and connecting with his father throughout the process and praying for us each by name as he did it.  He would think of the process it would take for us to learn how to love him.  There would be times He would need to use a saw, sandpaper, and plainer to mold us into something beautiful.  Each time he would measure and cut the board it would be that much closer to fitting perfectly into its place on a table or chair.  And every completed piece of furniture he made would remind him of His kingdom that was to come after years of molding and shaping.  Wow. 

 You see, the gospel is everywhere, and not by chance. It's in the molding and shaping of wood for a coffee table and in the change of seasons throughout the year.    An observant walk at night under the stars will tell you how big and wonderful our God is. 

Psalms 19 says "The heavens declare the glory of God; the skies proclaim the work of his hands.  Day after day they pour forth speech; night after night they display knowledge. There is no speech or language where their voice is not heard.  Their voice goes out into all the earth, their words to the ends of the world"

So now every time I rest my feet or place a Tona on my coffee table I can be reminded of God's commitment to mold me as his loved child.  He created me, he knows what it takes to fit me in right where I belong.  And you know, this coffee table that seems complete may require some sanding and a new paint finish down the road someday.  He's never finished molding us into what we were created to be.  Lean into that today.